Remembering how to be a woman
by a.touch.eclectic
Summary: Young Blades Fic When D'artagnan, Siroc and Ramon fall victim to a spell, Jacqueline must take care of them.
1. The sorcerer

The same story as before, just revised and improved.

Jacqueline really loathed these daily patrols. Nothing ever happens while they were protecting the country side. Even if there were rumors of people and animals behaving in strange ways in this area, today was a slow day.

"Did you find anything Ramon?" Jacqueline asked, remembering to lower her voice. Because of the strange rumors, Captain Duval had requested that all four friends patrol together in hopes of finding anything useful.

"No, nothing. Though I saw D'Artagnan a few minutes ago, and he said that he thought he saw something. He hasn't reported back, so I would guess he didn't find anything either," Ramon spoke.

"Hey everyone, I think you might want to take a look at this!" They heard D'Artagnan's voice a little ways off. Heading off in the direction of his voice, they wondered what their comrade had in store for them.

"I just found him, lying by the side of the road. He's unconscious, but his breathing and heartbeat seem normal," D'Artagnan said from the ground, cradling an old man's head in his lap. The other musketeers gathered around, trying to assess what was wrong with the man.

Suddenly, his eyes opened wide. He stared at the group of men, then became almost mesmerized by Jacqueline. She looked back confused, feeling almost as if the man could see into her soul. Then he opened his mouth, and a raspy sound came out. "Niag an amo wae botwoh reh ach et regn uo yeht mor fngiht onr ebm eme rl liwu oye getnes erp ro uyot nru ter uoyd luohs sya de erferac otnrut erregn uo yemo ceb nem gnuoyn oisufn ocdnar aef fom itciv reht onaha." The musketeers stared in confusion.

"What did you say?" Ramon asked, as his voice cracked. His beard began to get progressively thinner, until it disappeared all together.

The old man was ignored as the musketeers stared at their comrade. "What's happening to you?" D'Artagnan asked his friend, his voice significantly higher than normal. He also noticed that the ground seemed to be coming up to greet him.

"I think the old man put some sort of spell on us," Siroc inferred. His clothes were hanging off of him as he grew shorter and smaller.

"Sorcery! Witchcraft!" Jacqueline shouted, still the same as she was earlier. She scanned the area, looking for the man, but he had managed to disappear without a trace. When she turned back to her companions, she was shocked at what she saw.

D'Artagnan struggled to lift his sword, now twice as tall as him. Ramon looked at around quizzically, his thumb in his mouth, holding his jacket to him like a lifesaver. Siroc examined himself and his child-like comrades, still trying to unravel this mystery.

"Jacques, why aren't you little too?" Siroc asked the young woman.

"Uh, well..." Jacqueline didn't have a reply for the child inventor.

"Hungwy," Ramon said around his thumb. Jacqueline looked at the children in slight fear. What was she going to do? Captain Duval would be furious if he found out his best musketeers were now barely old enough to lift a sword.

"Jacqueline, can we go back home now? I'm tired," D'Artagnan gazed up at her, not realizing what he said.

"Jacqueline!" Siroc looked shocked. Ramon just looked at Jacqueline with his head tilted slightly to the side.

Jacqueline sighed. This was going to take a lot of explaining. "Well, yes. I am a woman. But now, the more important thing is for you three to find a place to hide. Captain Duval won't be happy with any of us until we get you back to normal."

"I'll get started right away with an antidote," Siroc replied. "To the garrison!" Then Siroc tried to mount his horse, but it was no use when he could barely reach the horse's back, let alone climb onto it.

"Here, let me help you." Jacqueline got young Siroc and D'Artagnan situated on their horses, then looked at Ramon. "I think you are a little too young to ride by yourself," she determined.

"Up." Ramon lifted his arms into the air, indicating he wanted to ride with Jacqueline. She sat him in the saddle, then climbed up next to him. As she grabbed her horse's, as well as Ramon's horse's, reins, the toddler snuggled down into Jacqueline's lap. "Mama," he whispered.

Jacqueline was startled, but gave a slight smile. Maybe this could be fun after all.


	2. Surprise for Captain Duvall

Ramon had fallen asleep on Jacqueline's lap. His thumb slipped from his mouth and the overgrown jacket he had clung to now lay limp in his lap. Jacqueline looked at the toddler with a smile.

"Are we there yet?" The now little D'Artagnan broke into her thoughts.

"Does it look like we're there yet?" Even as a child, he still grated on her nerves.

"Judging from the time it took to come out and the time we've taken traveling back, we still have about a half hour left." Even as a child, Siroc still had a sharp mind.

"Well, we need that time. What are we going to do about you three?" Jacqueline was worried. "Captain Duvall won't take kindly to three children in the garrison."

"Hey, I resent that!" D'Artagnan yelled loudly.

"Like it or not, you are about the same size as your sword. I wouldn't take offense to being called a child if I were you, or you could end up in a lot of trouble," Jacqueline retorted. D'Artagnan just let out an exasperated sigh and leaned back in the saddle.

"I can try working on some sort of antidote, but if that guy did use some sort of sorcery on us, we may just have to wait it out," Siroc reasoned.

"I agree. I can't make heads or tails of what he was chanting. It certainly seemed like a spell to me. Though why he would make you children, that makes no sense either," Jacqueline mused.

"Why are we running away anyway? Don't we want to catch this sorcerer?" D'Artagnan asked the others.

"We are not running away. We are searching for a solution to our problem. Maybe you could offer some input, rather then whining all the time," Siroc jeered at the other child.

"I'm not whining. I just think that if we find the man, he can tell us what to do to return us to normal."

"Why would he tell us if he was the one to turn you into kids in the first place?" Jacqueline reasoned with him. All she really wanted was some peace and quiet to figure out what to tell Captain Duvall.

All too soon, the musketeer garrison stood out in front of them. Jacqueline heaved a big sigh and entered the stables, followed closely by a still whining D'Artagnan and a pensive Siroc.

"Laponte, you're back earlier than expected. Where are the others? And who are these children?" Captain Duvall greeted the band of companions.

Jacqueline hadn't been able to come up with a plausible excuse, so she decided to stick with the truth. "We were on patrol and we found a man unconscious on the ground. When he woke up, he said some really odd things, then suddenly D'Artagnan, Ramon, and Siroc started to shrink. These children are them now," she explained as she got off her horse, careful not to jolt the sleeping Ramon.

"Children! Now we have children in the garrison? This is unbelievable!" Duvall wasn't pleased with this turn of events. Jacqueline felt it wise not to point out that he had played host to his own niece and nephew for a short period of time in the garrison.

"Captain, I swear I'll watch over them. D'Artagnan and Siroc are really capable of taking care of themselves; I'll just keep an eye on them. I swear, you won't even realize they're here." Jacqueline hoped she could calm the hysterical captain down.

"You promise? I'm leaving them totally in your care. Private Laponte, you get them back to normal, or you will be covering for all three of them."

"Yes sir," Jacqueline breathed a sigh of relief. 'Well, one thing down.' She thought. "Now, you two, you need to see to your horses."

"Ahh, why Jacqueli - Jacques?" D'Artagnan caught himself.

"Because even if you are children, that doesn't mean you can blow off your duties." Jacqueline looked down on him with her hands on her hips.

"Jacques, can you help me get my saddle off?" Siroc beckoned her over to his horse's stall.

"Sure, I'd be happy to help you Siroc."

"Mama! Mama!" Jacqueline turned to Ramon, who she had laid on the hay as she spoke with Duvall.

"Ramon, you can't keep calling me mama. Even if people knew I was a woman, it still isn't right. At least call me papa, if you must." The toddler just gave her a blank stare.

"Hungwy mama." He looked at her with pleading eyes.

"Yeah, I'm hungry too." D'Artagnan came over from the horse stall, clutching his stomach in melodramatic pain.

"I'd like to eat now as well." Siroc looked at her sheepishly, as though he wasn't allowed to make demands like that.

"You want dinner? I'll see what Captain Duvall has in the kitchen. In the mean time, you two take Ramon out and wash up. And I'll be inspecting hands when you come back, so don't try to sneak past me," Jacqueline warned. D'Artagnan gave her a scowl, but obediently took Ramon's right hand as Siroc took his left and walked out to wash their hands.

That night, Jacqueline stared up at her ceiling in near exhaustion. Running after D'Artagnan and Siroc was more than she bargained for. And then there was Ramon. Who knew two-year-olds had so much energy? "Let's just hope tomorrow will be a better day," she muttered into the darkness and slipped into sleep.


	3. Yes Mother

"Siroc, what do you think you're doing?" Jacqueline yelled at the miniaturized inventor. He stood poised over his work table, a stool under his feet to allow him to actually see over it. A smoking beaker sat on the table, a horrible smell of rotting eggs emitting from it, and in Siroc's hand, a glass of light green liquid was about to be poured into it.

"I'm just mixing a solution of copper with a solution of heated sulfur. Don't worry, I've done it before." Siroc tried to calm her as his hand moved closed to the beaker of haze.

"Oh no you don't, not while I'm in charge. This is really dangerous. What if you end up blowing us all up one day?" Jacqueline yanked the glass of green liquid away and set it down carefully on the table. "Now, go do your chores like I asked you to. And no more mixtures until you're back to normal. Then it's your own fault, I don't have to watch you anymore."

"Yes Ma'am," Siroc muttered, giving her a glare. Since when did she get all high and mighty?

"Mama, Mama." Ramon ran into the room, hugging Jacqueline around the ankles.

"Ramon, what have I told you about calling me 'mama'?" Jacqueline kneeled down to look Ramon in the eye.

"It's bad," he replied quietly.

"Yes, it is. Now -" Before Jacqueline could finish her thought, D'Artagnan burst into the room, brandishing a sword nearly as tall as him.

"Ha, I am D'Artagnan! None can defeat me!" He boasted, and nearly fell over as his sword began to fall, carrying him with its weight.

"Oh great D'Artagnan, teach me how to fight like you!" Jacqueline mocked him in a high pitched voice. "Now, what did I tell you about fighting?" She glared as he stood with both hands on the hilt, barely able to keep it upright in his scrawny, little kid arms.

"I don't care what you said, you're not the boss of me."

"Oh yes, I am. Until you're back to your annoying adult self, Captain Duval doesn't want a peep out of you three. That means I am in charge of you, meaning you'll do as I say." Jacqueline towered above the boy, both hands on her hips, and stared down at him.

"Or what? You'll spank me?" D'Artagnan looked at her like she wouldn't dare hurt him.

"Maybe. Or maybe I'll just tell Constance about Marguerite." Jacqueline smirked. D'Artagnan had seemed genuinely interested in Constance, and would have been very upset if she had learned about his "close friendship" with Marguerite. D'Artagnan just glared at her, his hands now on his hips as well as though to counter Jacqueline's stance.

"Fine, _mother_. You win this battle Jacqueline. But I promise, you won't win the war!" D'Artagnan yelled and stalked off.

Jacqueline rolled her eyes at him. "Boys," she muttered.

* * *

"Mama, can't sweep." Ramon entered her room that night, clutching a blanket and sucking on his thumb yet again.

"What's wrong?" Jacqueline turned toward the toddler.

"Monster!" Ramon said gravely.

"Come on up here. Let me tell you about monsters." Jacqueline pulled the boy up into her bed. She set him down as a clap of thunder rolled through the garrison.

"Scawy," Ramon whispered, cuddling closer to Jacqueline.

"Monsters can't hurt you, and neither can -" Jacqueline stopped at the knock on her door.

"Come in," she beckoned, not surprised when D'Artagnan and Siroc opened the door.

"We thought you might like - some protection," D'Artagnan said, very quickly. Siroc nodded his head gravely. Just then, there was another thunder clap. In unison, Siroc and D'Artagnan ran toward the bed and slipped in on either side of her and Ramon.

"As I was just telling Ramon, thunder can't hurt you. It's very simple. Thunder is just the angels playing drums. They're making music, if you just listen." Jacqueline smiled as all three boys lifted their heads and strained their ears to hear it. The soft pattering of the rain and the rushing wind made a sweet melody, while the thunder kept the beat steady.

"I can hear it," Siroc announced, proud of his accomplishment.

"I heard it first," D'Artagnan boasted.

"No, I did."

"I did."

"I did!"

"It doesn't matter who heard it first. Now, do you three want to hear my monster story, or not?" Jacqueline asked.

"Monsters scawy," Ramon whispered into Jacqueline's arm.

"No, they're not. When I was little, my mother told me a story all about them. It goes like this:

"One day, a little boy lay in bed, all tucked in nice and cozy. But he was scared. He was sure there was a monster under his bed that would come up and eat him the moment he fell asleep. His parents insisted there was no such thing as monsters, but the little boy's friend had seen a monster himself, so they must be real. His eyes were so heavy, but he couldn't fall asleep. If he did, the monster would get him. Just as the boy was about to fall asleep, he heard heavy breathing coming from under his bed. He was instantly awake, laying completely still, hoping the monster would go away. But the breathing just got louder and louder, and closer and closer. Finally, the breathing was right next to him. The boy couldn't take it anymore. He turned his head slightly to the right, and screamed.

"'Oh, please don't hurt me,' The monster said, almost crying. 'I don't want to get eaten.'

"'Why would I want to eat you? You're the one who wants to eat me,'" The little boy asked the monster.

"'Eat a little boy? That's just gross. Who'd want to eat a thing like you? I'd much rather prefer a nice, warm loaf of bread.' The monster was disgusted at the idea that he would eat a boy.

"'I like bread too. Especially right after mama takes it out of the stove.' The boy sat up, surveying the monster. 'You know, you're not as scary as I thought you'd be.'

"'And you're not as scary as I thought you'd be,' The monster replied. The boy smiled, and the monster returned the gesture.

"So, you see, the moral is that you have to experience something first, to know if it's scary or not," Jacqueline supplied, but it fell upon deaf ears. The three boys were fast asleep, cuddled closely to her.

"Goodnight boys," Jacqueline whispered, and settled down to sleep.

* * *

"Siroc, hurt me," Ramon whispered to the sleeping lump on him. The older boy didn't stir at all. Ramon finally wiggled out from under him. Then, in the light of the pre-dawn morning, the toddler went to explore. Unfortunately for him, the garrison door was left wide open and inviting. 


	4. Missing

"Ramon! Ramon, where are you?" Jacqueline yelled throughout the garrison.

"What's wrong Jacqueline?" Siroc poked his head out of his laboratory.

"I can't find Ramon. Wait, what are you doing in the laboratory? Did you clean your room like I asked you to?"

Siroc rolled his eyes. "Yes _mother_," he muttered sarcastically.

"Then, would you please help me look for Ramon? I can't find him anywhere," Jacqueline ignored the snide comment, more focused on the missing toddler.

"I finished the dishes Jacques. Can I go now?" D'Artagnan stood in the doorway of Ramon's room as Jacqueline kneeled on the floor, searching under the furniture for the missing child.

"May I, and no, you may not. I need you to help us find Ramon," she stated as she ripped open Ramon's closet.

"I haven't seen him in the garrison at all. He might have gotten out. He wasn't in the room when I woke up," Siroc reported back. Jacqueline practically hit herself. Why hadn't she gone looking for him when he wasn't in bed with her that morning. Then she remembered why, D'Artagnan.

Jacqueline blushed slightly at the memory of the way D'Artagnan had "innocently" laid his hand on her chest sometime during the night. She had been too busy telling him off for touching her than to notice that Ramon was gone.

"Split up. We'll meet back here in one hour. Ask around, see if anyone has seen Ramon at all!" Jacqueline ordered the boys out of the garrison. As they spread out, she took a deep breath. Ramon's fate was in her hands now. If she didn't find him, who knew what would happen to the little boy.

"Ramon! Ramon!" Jacqueline yelled out down the streets.

* * *

Ramon was scared. "Mama," D'Artagnan and Siroc weren't around. The busy streets of Paris were confusing and hostile to the toddler. "Mama! Mama, where you?" Ramon yelled down the streets.

"Oh, are you lost little boy?" A young woman bent down to Ramon's level. Her loose, long brown hair hung down, framing her smiling face and bright blue eyes. Ramon felt he could trust this young woman's honest features. "What's your name?" The teenager asked him.

"Wamon." He answered.

"Ramon?" She clarified. "My name's Baptista. Who are you looking for?"

"Mama."

"Well, I'll help you find her." Baptista put out her arms, silently asking Ramon if he wanted to be carried. He walked up to her and snuggled into her warm embrace.

"Well, aren't you friendly?" Baptista chuckled at Ramon's fearless manner. "Let's go find your mother." She set out with Ramon resting comfortably on her hip.

* * *

Jacqueline was scared, more scared than she'd ever been in her life. Ramon's life was in her hands, and she had failed him. Then, she heard a faint voice, and turned in that direction.

"Mama!" Ramon yelled again, sitting restlessly on the hip of an unknown, yet familiar looking woman.

"Ramon!" Jacqueline yelled back, not caring that dozens of people could have connected her to the cry for a child's mother, not a musketeer. Yet, as people are prone to do, they ignored the yells that did not affect them.

The young woman set Ramon down, and he ran full speed toward Jacqueline. "Oh Ramon, I was so worried. Don't you ever, ever run off again, do you hear me?" Jacqueline scooped him up into her arms and held him tight. She then looked around to thank the woman who had found him.

But Baptista had silently left them, smiling at their joyful reunion. She figured that this musketeer, like her brother, was a lady's man, and thought that endearing himself to children, even to the point of allowing them to call him mama, was a clever way of finding more women.

Jacqueline sighed. She had wanted to thank her, and also she if she could remember where she had seen that face. It was so familiar, she was sure she had met the girl before.

"Ramon, let's go back." Jacqueline gave up, and clutched Ramon's tiny hand tightly in her own.

That night, as Jacqueline was tucking Ramon in to bed, he startled her with a simple statement.

"I yove you mama." He gave her a big grin and a kiss to go with the sweet saying.

"I love you too Ramon." She smiled back at her surrogate son. Jacqueline marveled at how much she had really enjoyed the last few days. Sure they had been hard, but she grew to love Ramon, Siroc and even D'Artagnan, as children of course. They really had become almost like sons for her. They were part of her joy in life now, her children.


	5. Epilogue

The sunlight streamed in the window, distorted and mixed by the wavy glass. Jacqueline rolled away from the light, trying to catch a few extra minutes of precious sleep. At least she didn't have three little boys in her bed like yesterday morning.

"Jacques, time to get up!" D'Artagnan called, banging on her door.

"I'm up, I'm up - D'Artagnan?" Jacqueline dressed quickly, not believing what she had heard. He sounded - normal this morning.

"Whoa, what's the big rush Jacques?" Siroc asked, righting the young woman who had run from her room. She had nearly tripped over him in her excitement and urgency to discover the truth.

"Siroc, is that really you? You're not a child anymore?" Jacqueline now stood eye to eye with the blond inventor.

"Well, I should hope I'm not a child anymore. Are you all right?" Siroc gave her a confused look. "Your voice is kind of - high. Are you coming down with something?"

Jacqueline's face gained a faint blush. In her excitement, she had forgotten to lower her voice. But, Siroc knew her secret, or at least, he had, as a child.

'Was it a dream?' She pondered. Obviously, Siroc didn't remember, and Ramon wore a similar face to Siroc's confused one.

"Maybe you should go back to bed," Ramon suggested.

"Just a second. Where is D'Artagnan?" Jacqueline took off, searching for her other comrade. She found him sitting in the dining hall, about to set out for his daily patrol

"Hello Jacques? What's up?" D'Artagnan gave her a slightly flirtatious smile. Jacqueline could care less, things were back to normal.

* * *

That night as she was going to bed, Jacqueline discovered a piece of paper on her bedside table. It simply read: We love you, your 'sons'. 


End file.
